I ran into a former co-worker today (while I was out and about with another former co-worker).

I'm not really sure how to say this... I mean, it's not about this person, as she's nice and cool and everything. But I kind of hate running into acquaintances I once knew.

I was also at the supermarket today, sort of milling around when I saw someone I recognized. Not someone whose name I can remember, mind you (although now that I think of it... maybe I do), but I somehow placed I took a semester of Norwegian with him 4+ years ago. I also dislike this. But this is more of a fear that they will then somehow recognize me and then acknowledge me, forcing me into a conversation that I'd rather not be a part of. But I'm not going to talk about that, because it's not as interesting to me. Just random encounters with people I've actually known.

I dislike this probably because I'm sort of anti-social.

But I've got my reasons! And I'm going to list them. It might only be two items.

1) If you haven't seen the person in years or so, and you just randomly encounter them on the street... I never really know what to say. I mean, I haven't seen that person in a while, and then all of a sudden we're small-talking out of obligation of recognizing each other... and I guess I find it weird that all of a sudden this person, who may have been somewhat close at some point, is now just someone you casually know.

And it usually means the conversation repeats the same type of questions. My least favorite is "what are you doing?" Usually because everyone else usually replies "making s*** tons more cash than you." (That's a lie. They only think that...) My usual response is that I'm either living, breathing, doing things, or nothing. I don't know why, but it's better than talking about work. Especially when their bank account crushes mine.

2) Sometimes I just ignore people. Even people I've been really close to at one point, just because it's been years since I've last seen them and I feel guilty for not keeping in touch with them. Not that this alleviates the guilt... and it probably only adds to it, but in the moment, it seems easier to try to ignore the situation and hope the person doesn't see me. This might make me a terrible person.

3) This hasn't happened yet, but I'm terrified of the moment that it actually does. I've written out a fake conversation that would never happen because I would never draw attention to it, but it'd nonetheless be on my mind the entire time.

Person: Hello Alex.
Me: Hey, you.
Person: How's it going?
Me: Alright... you?
Person: Doing good, working a lot, you know...
Me: Yep...
Person: So yeah...
Me: ....
Person: ....
Me: Why'd you un-friend me on Facebook?

I don't really keep a running track of people who has un-friended (or de-friend... not sure what the preferred nomenclature is here) me or anything. But Facebook makes it really easy to find out. Right now, I could type in one of my sibling's names trying to get into their profile... and under their name might be someone I was once "friends" with, except it'll have the "32 mutual friends" part below it. Meaning we are no longer friends.

I don't know why people do it--I wouldn't do it, just because I'd feel bad if they ever found out (although, again... I haven't seen a lot of people recently, so... doubt they'd really care, but still.) I would assume most reasons are to clean their friends list a little bit, or because for some reason the person clogs up their news feed. Which I would assume isn't a problem for me anymore, since I rarely post anything on it nowadays... so the next logical explanation would be that they never liked me in the first place. Or I did something terrible to them, and that's been their lasting impression of me. (Maybe I tried ignoring them when I randomly saw them, only they caught me trying to ignore them... could happen.)

But anyway... this is a fear not because I'm bitter at anyone for doing it. But rather that it'll be rather awkward when they try to be chummy with me when I have proof that they have arbitrarily decided I was no longer a "friend."

Not that it's a big deal, I suppose, but I imagine it'd be super uncomfortable.

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Another thing I've noticed is that when hanging out with someone I haven't seen in a long while, someone upon departure will inevitably say "we should hang out more often." And it never happens.

One time I didn't do this. I said something to the effect of "I'd say that we should hang out more often, but we probably won't." I like this because it's usually true. I'm thinking about using it to replace the "let's hang out again soon" thing... maybe make it sound a little more clever or something. But I'm curious if it might have the effect of actually hanging out with the person more...