I don't usually talk about hockey, because... well, I don't really like hockey.

But today the NHL team Atlanta Thrashers officially finalized plans that would move them to Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. This marks the 2nd or 3rd time that Atlanta has lost an NHL hockey team, and this marks the first time since the Jets moved to Phoenix that Winnipeg has an NHL team.

Now, I don't want to sound particularly callous, because I'm going to have to deal with my own team relocating in about a year or so when the Vikings move to LA, but a lot of the articles I've seen on who to blame for the Thrashers' failure in Atlanta. And my thought is this: why are we being so negative? Not that I'm terribly familiar with the situation surrounding the team and the city, but Atlanta's notorious for being a really fair-weather city, and not really supporting their teams as much as they should. Plus, hockey had already failed there. Plus, it's Atlanta. No one plays hockey there. Is it that hard to explain?

But really, we should be celebrating, because it means that Canada gets another team, which is good because... Canada actually cares about hockey. And because hockey is always going to be somewhat of a niche sport, and what better way to celebrate that than to put as many teams in Canada as possible.

Honestly, they need more teams in Canada, and they need to move every single southern team out of the south. Because I'd actively decide to support the sport if the territories somehow got a team.

I went ahead and did a little bit of my own relocating plans:

-Florida Panthers--move to Quebec, they become the Nordiques.
-Carolina Hurricanes--move back to Hartford, Conn. Resume play as the Whalers.
-Tampa Bay Lightning--they move to Nova Scotia. I was trying to come up with a proper name for them, so I tried Googling Nova Scotia, and while entering in the province, the second option was "nova scotia duck tolling retriever." So that's their name. The Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retrievers.
-Nashville Predators--they move to Newfoundland. But in a sign of solidarity with their province partners Labrador, they name their team the Newfoundland Labradors. That's a built in rivalry with the Duck Tolling Retrievers right there, people.
-Anaheim Ducks--they move to the territories! It could work... as long as like 20% of the entire population between the three territories buy season tickets. Anyway, they become the Northwest Territories' Mighty Ducks of Yukon and Nunavut. Because... yeah.
-Phoenix Coyotes--they move to the comfy confines of Saskatchewan, Canada. And immediately become the Saskatchewan Sasquatches. This is because I'm ignorant and always assumed Saskatchewan meant the same thing as Sasquatch. They don't, as far as I'm aware of now.
-LA Kings--they move to Alaska, because I don't want Canada to get too greedy. They embrace their former roots, and become the Alaska Soviets. This gives the NHL a huge Russian fanbase, as well as making them the most hated NHL team in the 1950's.
-San Jose Sharks--they go to Portland. They like hockey, right? They just stay the Sharks because I can't think of anymore stupid team names.
-Dallas Stars--Of course, they move back to Minnesota. Can we support two hockey teams? Probably not! But what the hell!

Seriously. This would be a hundred times better than what it currently is. Of course, it would lose craptons of money, since you'd need entire populations attending at least ten games a season. But still! If this type of relocation happened, I'd probably have about 12 favorite hockey teams...